Want more mail?
We all like to receive messages. Here's some advice from Christian Connection staff and members to help you get more:

  • You won't generally get mail unless you send it, so don't sit around waiting. You may need to contact a few members before you find someone you click with. Remember everyone is in the same boat - so take the plunge and get mailing.

  • First messages can be the hardest. Start by telling the person something about yourself or something you have in common, based on your profiles. Maybe you both like the same books or both play tennis. Keep it positive and invite them to write back to you.

  • Take it slowly and be patient. People who send out five mails a day and want a fast response will be disappointed. It's about quality not quantity. Building relationships takes time, sometimes months to build up communication and trust.

  • Think about how you express yourself. The way you come across in your mail and your profile matters. Sloppy spelling and grammar does put people off.

  • Avoid one liners such as: 'Hi I'm Chris, I like your profile.' - they make you appear lazy and put pressure on the other person. Generally this type of mail is poorly received and the sender rarely gets mail in return.

  • Complete your profile. Members who fill out all the questions, and have good photos are much more likely to receive mail.

Remain positive if you have sent one message and nothing has happened. There are lots of interesting people who would like to hear from you. People usually take a little while to reply even if they have already seen the mail, they go on holiday or are just busy and thinking about how to reply.

While we all like to receive messages, it is equally important to reply to all your messages. It is only courteous.

What Not to Write

  • DON'T write in SUSTAINED CAPITALS. It can look like shouting.

  • DON'T give out your home email or telephone number too quickly - it can be a bit intimidating for the receiver to reply likewise. One of the reasons why people use the site is because it offers a secure way to communicate. If members send their personal contact details in their initial mail to another member before there has been any two way communication it can be grounds for termination of membership. And remember, once you have given out your personal details, it is very hard to stop further contact.

  • DON'T ask too many direct, personal factual questions at first. You can always talk about your approach to life, faith, likes and dislikes before trying to find out too many facts and figures. If you were to meet someone at a party or pub who was grilling you about your job and asking immediately for your phone number, chances are you would feel uncomfortable. The internet is no different.

  • DON'T promote non-Christian Connection events, products or services via the mailbox system.

Repeated misuse of the site in this way may result in your account being suspended.